Category Archives: Kids and Parenting Stuff

Jenny and terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day

Yesterday. *sigh* By 4:00 pm I was cooked.

1. The baby decided that a 30 minute nap was enough – thankyouverymuch. What, you’re not happy with 10 minutes in the car on the way to Target and 20 minutes in the high chair after lunch?
2. My budding mini Kat VonD decided to try out her new markers (damn you Target Dollar Spot!) on her legs, arms, face and stomach.
3. ADHD meds wore off too early causing SEVERE homework drama
4. 13-year-olds. Enough said.
5. Dishes and laundry and smelly bathroom, oh my!
6. It was 85 degrees and our AC is broken.

I needed a mommy time out. But where would I go? I really needed two things: wine and silence. I don’t know a single place that offers both. So I ditched the wine idea and walked Joann’s for 45 minutes.

It had me thinking…there are tons of women and moms like me. Women who want to get away for an hour, relax, have a glass of their favorite beverage, then go home refreshed and ready to tackle the next mommy-crisis.

But what place offers you that? Bars or restaurants are great if there’s a group of friends there together. Me going to a bar alone = sad and let’s face it, a little skeevy.

Shopping is OK. It’s not really relaxing…all that walking around and pressure to spend money when all you want to do is browse and use the loo.

So the old “Sot n’ Sew” idea came up again.

For those who don’t remember, Sot n’ Sew is my fictional crafting/bar. Women (I guess *some* men too) come in with their craft gear, order their favorite beverage, make something pretty and relax while doing it all. No pressure. No loud music. No kids, job, significant other. Just the company of other women, wine or beer, and your favorite paper/fabric/yarn project.

Sure, you could drink without doing crafts, but most moms start to twitch and go through withdrawals if they stop multitasking. And me, I think crafting is relaxing.

Most of all, you can go into a bar alone without feeling weird or that some skeevy guy is going to hit on you.

Sot n’ Sew will also have a quiet room. A soundproof room where the only noise are sighs of contentment and the tap of fingertips hitting a smartphone/tablet. It’s like your bathroom but without all the nasty and mess and kids reaching under the door begging for more juice.

So…Sot n’ Sew…I’d love to make it a reality. Anyone have $100k to loan?

Advertisements

I love the 80s…but only when it’s PG

We ditched cable over a year ago.

It wasn’t without complaint; believe me, it wasn’t easy getting these junkies off their daily fix of Spongebob and Wizards of Waverly Place. It was touch-and-go at first, but we survived.

We DO have basic cable: All the local channels plus some additional ones like eleventybillion shopping channels (really?? I don’t have fancy cable so I really don’t have money to shop all hours of the night), all the extra PBS channels and a couple of movie channels. OK, so they are more like B movie channels, but whatever. There is one – Movieplex – that plays some decent movies from time-to-time.

This weekend, we caught a trifecta of classic 80s movies:

 

My oldest daughter (12 years old) had never seen any of these classic movies. Being the hip and cool mom I am, I let her stay up an watch.

Wow…I did not remember some of the inappropriate parts to those movies, mostly Teen Wolf.

Did you remember this?

Yeah, me neither.

There were other parts that I forgot about, but overall it was OK for her to see.

Then there was the sequel.

1. I think Jason Bateman made a deal with the devil. That dude has not aged in almost 30 years!

Proof:

80s JB…

2012 JB:

OK…he’s got a few smile lines, but come on!

2. That movie is BAAAAD. Really, really bad. I almost didn’t watch it all.

3. It’s totally PG and appropriate for younger audiences (Yay!!).

Then…One Crazy Summer. I LOVE that movie.

This is probably my favorite part (among many):

The whole movie is a quotable, mad-cap, cheese-tastic film. And I love it. Best thing, my daughter loved it too.

With a few exceptions, 80s movie night was a success. But it made me pine for this:

I need to take a trip to the local used bookstore and see if they have a copy.

I’d hold that, but my hands are full.

We’re loud. We’re silly. We’re busy. We’re messy (sorry!) Someone is ALWAYS talking.

My big family: Four kids, two adults and one soft and furry rabbit.

Child number four is only 3 months old but in that short time I’ve gotten used to the sympathetic smiles and the ubiquitous, “Looks like you have your hands full.”

Wait. No I haven’t. So here’s my open letter to those who feel the need to say something when I’m out and about.

++++++++++++++

Dear Captain Obvious,

You know what, I do have my hands full. Thanks for pointing that out. Without you I wouldn’t realize that A. I have two hands and B. they have eight. And since I’m not an octopus or a spider or a millipede, I will always have my hands full.

If your sly remark is meant to shame me in to feeling embarrassed about my brood, think again.

  • This restaurant has high chairs and kids menus, so no, we’re not in the wrong place.
  • My kids have four different minds and four different personalities, of course everyone wants to do something different. It’s my place to teach them how to compromise.
  • What’s your vice? Now imagine being trapped in a place with that thing and not being able to touch, taste or feel it. Kinda sucks, right? Kids hate that too, that’s why God invented the dollar section at Target.
  • You should probably circle the parking lot for a different space. I’m not moving for at least another seven minutes.
  • As long as they are clean, dressed and fed don’t worry about me. That’s enough to make me happy.

So Captain, next time you see a “big” family, smile and give Mom or Dad the thumbs up because we need all the encouragement we can get. Now where is that girl’s shoe…

Sincerely,

Mom of four

 

Mr. Watson, come here. I have lockjaw.

Circle the correct description for this photo:

a. Sanford & Son starter kit
b. A million gleaming tetnus shot needles
c. Recycling bin renegade
d. Telephone

My 6-year-old son found this old rusted can in the yard this weekend. His immediate reaction to unearthing this beauty…let’s make a telephone out of it.

My husband’s immediate reaction…let’s make a CORDLESS telephone out of it. Meaning, no assembly required; instant fun accomplished.

Most of you will read this and have a couple of different reactions: 1. Your husband isn’t very handy if he can’t tie string to a can OR 2. You live in a polio pit of germy nastiness.

MY reaction to the whole tin can phone business, how did my 6-year-old know about this? It’s not like you see SpongeBob and Patrick using tin can telephones.

However he came up with this idea, I’m grateful for one thing (well, many things actually but for the purpose of this blog, just the one). In this Wii/smartphone/300+ channel world, my kid doesn’t need technology for fun. He can make his own fun with found treasure from our backyard.