Thank you x 1,000,000,000

I am a classic overachiever. Worse, I’m a fiercely independent overachiever.

I (think) I can do it all without any assistance. I’ve always supported my husband and kids. Never needed much help. Never ask for much from anyone.

Now I find myself in a position where I can’t do everything and I do need help. It’s been such a blow to my ego. I’ve cried every day because of it. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.

The easiest thing? Saying ‘thank you’. And this week, I’ve said it at least a hundred times.

I hate talking about finances. Just hate it. It’s ugly. It’s personal. It’s the weight on my back nearly everyday.

Last Sunday’s homily was just what I needed. I’ve been so stressed about our finances and Christmas and just the general ickiness of it all (money, not Christmas). I did exactly what Father Sal said…I made Jesus my financial advisor. (OK…he totally didn’t tell us to do that, but told us to give over your problems to Jesus — finances = our problem)

Jesus is my financial advisor. Has a nice ring. Could make great bumper stickers. But in all seriousness, this is what I did.

I can’t tell you what peace I felt after that.

Things were looking up. I cashed in some points from my CC for some gift cards (gifts!!). I was happy. I was at peace. Then, last week hit. Our refrigerator died and I totally lost it. I spent 2 days crying and worrying.

You know what…Jesus showed me up.

Now I’m crying for a whole different reason…I’m overwhelmed by generosity.

In four days our friends and family have: given us a fridge, offered to give us a fridge, offered to subsidize a new fridge, given us money, given us food (for our new fridge), given us a laptop, given us clothes, given us furniture. We had friends give us a great Christmas present for the kids a couple of weeks ago too.

We literally hit the jackpot on generosity.

And you know what…I will never doubt Jesus again.

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About seejenread

I love books.

Posted on December 10, 2012, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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